FOF #1029 – Relationship Status

Jul 24, 2009 · 1985 views

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Writer Byron Flitsch talks about relationships from the perspective of a gay man living in Chicago. The good, the bad, the ones that last and the ones that make a lasting impression. Also, another Chicago drag queen goes to jail for beating up a contest judge with a trophy she didn’t win.


  1. Jason Grzegorek says:

    I actually work in Censor-Nasty, Ohio (the home town area of the naked cowboy) as a government coordinator who happens to work closely with the naked cowboy’s father. I can’t say enough about the entire family. Whereas the majority of the small suburb accepts the naked cowboy, the rest of the city cannot grasp the ideals that will become Mr. Burke’s platform. I keep thinking I can help make the change here, but it get’s so tiring!!! What’s a girl to do?!

    • Wow Jason- so do you think that candidates like the Naked Cowboy are actually the future of the Republican party?

      • Jason Grzegorek says:

        Working in the government realm, I think there is a small shift in republicans. With embarrassments like McCain, Bush, Palin, more republicans (country-wide) are realizing that in order to survive they are going to need to “tweak” their stance. Candidates like the Naked Cowboy – a candidate with fiscally republican views and socially democratic views – will more than likely emerge. Personally, I could almost see a new party emerging, letting the “old” republican party die.

        In this city (which happens to be 20 years behind), I don’t think you will see someone like this ever be as vocal. It was a hugh deal when the first Democratic mayor was elected in over 20 years. You would think that a city whose housed Jerry Springer as mayor would be a bit more open minded.

        Being the only democrat and gay man in the office, I don’t believe I have drastically changed anyone’s view. However, in my new capacity, I have been able to be a bit more vocal. There is still more that NEEDS to be done.

  2. Marcin says:

    Yikes, I got on the show!

    Anyway, I think a lot of the points given were right. Will see how it turns out.

    I also agree that there is no such thing as “type”. I mean, I know what my “type” is, but pretty much all the guy I have been seriously romantically involved with in the past were not the “type” – some were quite the opposite. For me, this is really about personal chemistry, more than anything else. I never “settle” in that I go for a guy I do not have good chemistry with, but I am not looking for some perfect specimen either.

    Which, also, brings me to why online dating can be so tricky – because by the time you meet, you may have created a picture of the person in your head that is completely wrong, and then when you meet in person, it just doesn’t click.

  3. Byron Flitsch says:


    Thanks for sending in your question for the show! It’s a common thing for people to… “Creating the perfect picture” in any dating situation. I mean, it’s so easy to fall for what we want than what is right in front of us. I also blame media (who doesn’t!?). We see what things SHOULD be like and set expectations. It’s messed up quite a few situations for me.

  4. This is one of the most useful podcast I have listened to that will actually affect how I relate to people.
    I feel like all of you had addressed some of my deepest pain.
    Thank you Guys…. you are GREAT !

  5. Marcin says:

    I thought I owe you, guys, the finale to the story, since I brought it up, asking for an advice, in the first place.

    So, the thing fell through, after a grueling weekend of mood swing see-saw, with him first asking to meet me, then going AWOL, then asking to meet me, then going AWOL since Friday night until Monday night.

    Based on the snippets I got from him, it appears there might be a depression and possible an alcohol problem involved, which would explain his bipolar behavior, and the fact that he would disappear for hours etc.

    I guess I’m feeling really shitty because I was really into this guy, and our parting conversation was not nice either (I tried to suggest he should seek help about his depression; he said I’m trying to make him look crazy, etc. etc.). I really wish him all the best in life – if our “relationship” lasted longer than a week, perhaps I would get involved and tried to help him, but there was very little I could do otherwise, since he doesn’t seem to acknowledge there is a problem at all.

  6. I have a *little* bit of a crush on Byron thanks to this show. You’re always doing this! Dammit. o_O

  7. Byron is so cute! i have a gay older brother, too, and we are also the only two children, so it was interesting to hear from some one else who is in that situation.

  8. this was a great episode guys loved it!

  9. MaxMiami says:

    It was time we got advice on dating and relationships. I new that this well-rounded, informative podcast always aims to please.
    With all this crazy news I hope Chicago doesn’t start restrictions on trannies and drag queens – what will straight boys do for Halloween?
    Keep up the great work, guys!

  10. Adam Robinson says:

    I really enjoyed the show. Thanks Byron!

  11. Byron Flitsch says:

    I’m really glad that everyone is enjoying the show! If you’d like to keep up to date with columns, you can always facebook/email me to add you for the updates. I also take questions! It’s refreshing to see so many interesting in fine tuning/searching for serious relationships.

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