FOF #1308 – Happiness for the Holidays

Dec 20, 2010 · 23717 views

Kate Bornstein - photo of Kate on the left by Maxwell Ander, Toronto. Montage by Fausto Fernós

Every year in the U.S., thousands of teens commit suicide due to bullying over being perceived as LBGT or as outsiders. The holidays, with all its pressures and unrealistic expectations can leave many with feelings of isolation and despair. What’s the best way to get through it all?

Joining us today is Kate Bornstein, author of the groundbreaking book “Gender Outlaw” as well as “My Gender Workbook” and most recently “Hello Cruel World: 101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks and Other Outlaws” which is also available as an iPhone app so you can get the bite sized words of wisdom right when you need it.

Kate’s writing bridges the gap between people from all sexual and gender walks of life, between man and woman, between old and young and between popular culture and academia.

What's a girl trapped in a cybernetic, sentient robot hellbent on destroying humanity supposed to do?

Most recently Kate has gotten into an intense discussion with other bloggers about the controversy over the word “Tranny.” On top of all that, ze (that’s Kate’s preferred pronoun) has also been trying to save the SyFy Network’s canceled TV series “Caprica” which portrays the digital consciousness of a teenage girl trapped in a hulking robotic body living in a world where gay couples are gangsters and religious fundamentalists live in poly-sexual group marriages.

Listen as we talk about the appeal of avatars to trans people, the dangers of wanting to fit in, becoming straight but not heterosexual, how to bring peace and joy into your holiday season and for the rest of your life, and are you a war mongering hater-homo? Take our quiz and find out!

Bonus Question:

Now that Don’t Ask Don’t Tell has been repealed, besides marriage equality, what is the future of the LGBTQ movement? What challenges do we face in the future? What do we need to pay more attention to? Post it in the comments below, the best ones get read on tomorrow’s show.

Featured Books:
Kate Bornstein:
Hello Cruel World: 101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks and Other Outlaws
My Gender Workbook
Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women and the Rest of Us

Featured Music:
Do You Take It? – The Wet Spots: iTunes | Site

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SUBSCRIBE ON: GOOGLE

    Comments

  1. seawall says:

    Oh man, I am over the moon that you got Kate back on. Fangirl explosion, clean up, aisle two…

    There is so much going on in this ‘cast I’m gonna have to listen again later so I can savour every idea brought up. Good job, guys.

    • Yeah you can say “Kate has written the book” but in reality ze has written many books on Gender fluid dynamics and influenced countless people on how we’re all interconnected when it comes to our identieis and our sexuality.

      It’s truly an honor to chat with Kate, personally been so influential to me, all the way back in 1995 when I read zis book Gender Outlaw, it gave me a great appreciation for why I dressed in drag as an artist and what was going on in the audiences minds.

      I wouldn’t be as comfortable with myself if it wasn’t for people like Kate, which by zis books I consider to be part of my academic training. I’m a better person because of Kate Bornstein.

  2. Anon says:

    You guys just made the rest of my year!!!! What a treat to see another interview with Kate. Off to listen now!!!

  3. Marcin says:

    Just wanted to chime in about the popularity of “Sebastian” in queer culture, as it predates “Neverending Story” by centuries.

    St. Sebastian has been always seen as a crypto-gay icon, depicted as an ecstatic man, always looking beautiful even when dieing, pierced with many arrows/shafts (subtle, eh?) in homoerotic renaissance paintings (in the catholic church, he is also quite coincidentally, a patron of young men, athletics and delivery from plagues).

    A gay author, Tennessee Williams named his gay character in “Suddenly Last Summer” Sebastian.

    Sebastian is the name of the gay character in “Brideshead Revisitited”.

    An openly gay director, Derek Jarman, filmed an extremely homoerotic (and scandalous) “Sebastiane”, being an alternative account of St. Sebastian’s story, in 1970s.

    Oscar Wilde used the name Sebastian Melmoth as his pseudonym when he travelled through Europe.

    This is what wikipedia says on the topic: “It is plausible that the earliest gay icon was Saint Sebastian. The combination of his strong, shirtless physique, the symbolism of the arrows penetrating his body, and the look on his face of rapturous pain have intrigued artists both gay and straight for centuries, and began the first explicitly gay cult in the 19th century. Richard A. Kaye wrote, “contemporary gay men have seen in Sebastian at once a stunning advertisement for homosexual desire (indeed, a homoerotic ideal), and a prototypical portrait of tortured closet case.” Due to Saint Sebastian’s status as gay icon, Tennessee Williams chose to use that name for the martyred character Sebastian in his play, Suddenly, Last Summer. The name was also used by Oscar Wilde—as Sebastian Melmoth—when in exile after his release from prison. Wilde—Irish author, humorist and “dandy”—was about as “out of the closet” as was possible for the late 19th century, and is himself considered to be a gay icon.”

    Loved the show as usual. :D

  4. Marcin says:

    Also, I gotta say, Fausto, I love you for your passion. You thanked me for posting some moving stories lately – I wish to thank you for doing this podcast and being yourself.

    • Thanks for the praise Marcin!? So nobody’s answered this question yet- what do you think is the future of the LGBTQ movement now that DADT is history?

      • seawall says:

        I hoped someone else would answer because I don’t want to look like I’m spamming the forum (too late!), so here goes:

        Now that DADT is buried, the two other acronyms to focus on are DOMA and ENDA. DOMA should be repealed so that partners of LGBT people can get the respect and benefits they deserve, and ENDA should pass so that workplaces across the US can no longer discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. The latter is more likely to happen first because now that the military is more inclusive, civilian businesses who refuse to be will look petty and backwards (as they surely are).

        That’s the political angle. Socially we need to have each others’ backs as much as possible. Kate Bornstein highlighted the problem of in-fighting between trans people who don’t really mind if they’re associated with sex workers and those who do. Validating sex work and protecting sex workers is another battle entirely, but the point is a lot of queer folks are concerned with how they come off to mainstream straight society, and so we see gays and lesbians distancing themselves from trans issues, or the monogamous marriage-minded folks bashing those who favor polyamory, and just a lot of judgment leveled at would-be allies. Less criticism and more dialogue on these issues would be a good thing for all involved.

      • Good thoughtful comments are never spam.

      • Well certainly the discussion is happening, so I guess it’s just a matter of time before the next DADT is repealed, whatever that may be.

        My huge concern today is that the FCC poor defense of Net Neutrality means we wont be able to continue this conversation the way we’ve been able to have it, and sites like Feast of Fun won’t be able to exist anymore.

        How can grass roots movement develop (for any political persuasion) in an age where large companies control the flow of traffic on the internet?

      • seawall says:

        I honestly don’t know as much about internet policy as I do gay rights, so I can’t speak to that. It does sound problematic as you’ve put it, though.

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